"Uncle Mike"

Mayor Mike Sheldon was known as "Uncle Mike." He was always depicted without a jacket, his shirt sleeves rolled up, often with a cigar jammed into the corner of his wide mouth. His hair was iron gray and close-cropped. His passions were jazz and baseball. And, as it turned out, an ever-increasing amount of control over the lives of his constituents.

For purposes of comparison, here is the real "Uncle Mike list" for that week:

Rules for An Orderly Neighborhood

1. Working people have the right to quiet streets after 8PM so they can get a good night's sleep.
2. People have the right to walk down the street without being bothered with pleas for money.
3. People have the right to drive down the street without having to worry that somebody will step out from the curb and cause them to have an accident.
4. People have the right to an education that doesn't include any concepts which might disturb them or their parents.
5. Sidewalks are for walking, not for selling food, artwork, personal possessions or anything else.
6. Only licensed vendors are allowed to sell on the street, and then only at their assigned location.
7. Taxicabs can pick up and discharge passengers only at designated taxi stands.
8. Only the guilty have any reason to be afraid to give such things as
• Fingerprints
• Footprints
• Voice prints
• Retinal scans
• Handwriting samples
• DNA samples
• Urine samples
• Stool samples

and therefore the innocent should be willing to give any or all of these at any time, at the request of a police officer or any other representative of the government.

9. Smoking is illegal within the city limits.
10. When people are in public places they shouldn't be doing things they wouldn't want Uncle Mike to see.

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